After the birth

I realized in writing my last post that in stopping when Sam was born I left out more of the story, i.e. everything that happened after his birth!, so here’s the rest.


I mentioned that Sam’s cord was short, so he could only be placed on my belly after the birth.  He stayed there until the cord stopped pulsing and I could deliver the placenta.  I’m not sure exactly how much time passed but I think it was somewhere around 30 minutes.  Samuel was really chill and just looked around while he was there.  He didn’t really cry that much and was very alert.

Sometime right after the birth the student midwife showed up to help with the after birth care.  I’m not sure if it was just too early for her to make it to the birth or what but I think she literally walked in when he was on my belly still.  Soon the placenta was delivered and I almost didn’t feel it it was so easy.  At that point Mike got to cut the cord after the midwives clamped it.  They began to massage my stomach a little to make sure they got all the clots and extra blood out.  It was actually pretty painful but I could look at my baby so it was a little more bearable.  It was incredible to realize that this baby had actually been inside there that whole time!

After this I tried to breastfeed before Kelly “assessed the damage.”  Breastfeeding went pretty well and he had a really strong latch with a little assistance from the beginning.  I’m really glad he knew what he was doing because I really didn’t have a clue and I really felt like an imposter trying to feed this child!  Luckily the midwives were able to direct and give me some tips, then and over the next few days/weeks.  I was also holding him close to keep him warm.  At this point my mother in law was texting and asking how much he weighed, etc. but we hadn’t done any of that yet.  That was literally the last thing they did!

So after feeding him for a bit and generally just getting to hold him closer to me in my arms, I gave him to Mike for some bonding while I was stitched up.  I’m not exactly sure what the damage was but I know it couldn’t have been that bad since the more veteran midwife who is certified to repair third degree tears was not the one stitching me up. I did have multiple tears though.  I pretty much had no desire to look either, which I admit was rare for me.  Usually I love watching the surgery channel :) They gave me a local anesthetic and my mom fed me breakfast while I watched Mike hold Sam.  This seemed to take a while but they literally did this right on my bed where I gave birth and then I was able to swing back and lay down propped up a little.

I’ll go into this more later but they also changed my sheets during this time, so everything was nice and clean.  Ok, so although they were recording all the times of the pushes and documenting the fetal heart rate during the birth process, this is finally where they weighed and measured him, which is probably what he disliked the most.  It was literally like they took him away from me and he started crying.

Weighing him like a stork

He calmed down once he found his fingers to suck on again :)

Someone also helped me to the bathroom in here.  Our bathroom is less than 7 steps away from our bedroom and I was shocked at how out of breath I was.  It was like there was a giant weight on my chest that was preventing me from standing up and breathing at the same time.  I was pretty shocked by how exhausted I was physically after all that, but that was easily the most difficult thing physically I’ve done in my life.  I had that pressure on my chest for the first 2 or 3 days after birth anytime I stood up before it started to go away, so I pretty much just stayed in my bed that whole time apart from getting up to use the rest room.


I wish I had more eloquent words to describe how I felt and how I’m feeling now.  I do know that right after I had him I said a couple things to my husband and was definitely amazed that people have multiple children. I’m pretty sure that as a result of our sub-fertility I really spent little to no time thinking about the actual demanding part of labor because I knew “it would all be worth it”, and for that I am extremely grateful!  Great rewards demand great sacrifices and the strangest  part about it was that it really was like a roller coaster that there was no getting off, no pause button to catch your breath and get through.  As incredible as the birth process was and what a privilege it was to hold him so close to me for 9 months, it really is after the birth that’s the biggest miracle and what matters most.   THAT’S the beginning.  I’m really glad we were able to have a birth with no interventions, but I’m even more excited to get to learn and grow with this little soul.  That’s what mothering is and I’m amazed I get the chance to do it, and that this little grunty guy finally came to give me this opportunity!